Et puis je l'imagine habitant mon décor
These are the first lines form a very kitschy song, but they made me well up like nothing had in months, so I thought I'd record them here. I haven't been blogging much lately which is a shame because I've got plenty of ideas and then I end up forgetting about them:
"Authenticity" is H's favourite word. We used to talk past each other because he said my stuff was "not real". I retorted that if the tangible suffering of others is not real to us we have a bit of a problem. He liked my point - that one should care deeply about strangers- and I liked his. At some point I had refused to engage with people I did not immediately like, because I thought I was being unreal and that it was unhelpful. Then I took a new approach. And yet it is possible to go too far in the other direction. So "authenticity" might be a bit of a corker topic.
Some of my friends have dark "no go zones", zones in them which are raw and hurting, big areas of unhealed pain. Having been in counselling for a little while as an undergrad, I know of methods which bring these "no go zones" into healing and forgiveness. I used to think that people who had these zones were "non regenerated" in a way or another, and that they needed to confront that stuff. Then I noticed that the friends with the "no go zones" had a level of empathy which totally eludes me. Happiness is dangerous.
(One may say that -of course- these zones are "no go" for me, Dany, and that this just proves what a useless listener I am. Maybe that's true. But the status quo is that I am aware of them because my friends have cracked the shell in the first place and put their vulnerability in my -untrustworthy- hands. I treat them as "no go zones" and never mention them unless they do)
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