To love virtue...

Repeatedly, I've observed a well-established culture of loving "creatures comfort" in some Christian circles and I'm somewhat ambivalent towards it. I'm referring to liking good food, good wines, good hotels, trips abroad, great jewelry and that sort of stuff. Virtue, it seems, is something that is done because we have to, but deep down, we think it sucks.

Wait a minute, I thought: does anyone here love virtue? It seems to me that engaging in the messy business of being fully alive is way more interesting than many of the things just mentionned. People, this is the Holy Grail, this is the Life Abundant, wake up!

On the same day, I opened one of my most questionnable and devilshly uber-Machiavellian books, Robert Greene's The Art of Seduction. On some levels, I really like this book because it brilliantly exposes many the motivations of modern Western women and men. Seduction, then, simply amounts to fulfilling the desires for which people long, and Robert Greene has quite an extensive catalogue, full of trenchant observations.

Yet, each time I open The Art of Seduction, I'm reminded of C.S. Lewis' answer when asked if he would write some more Screwtape letters. He said no. What's more, he said, pinpointing the operative logics of Hell is fairly easy and it's not productive to the Christian agenda. The real art would be to make an equally compelling book about the operative logics of Heaven.

Anyway, in one chapter, Robert Greene was discussing the longing to escape virtue. He argues that most people are reluctantly leading moral lives, but they wish they didn't. What is seductive is the impression of a person (or an environment) that doesn't follow the moral life of being reasonnable, of giving to charity and that kind of stuff, but instead just indulges.

So now, the moral life has been reduced to a guilt-trip-inducing shadow constantly hovering over us. Things we should do... things we really should do... but keep pushing into some undefined future.

So my question remains: does anyone out there love virtue? Like C.S. Lewis's unwritten book about the logics of Heaven, I find it relatively easy to pinpoint the problem, and much harder to write down the solution. So the post stands unwritten. I read these lines and I'm thinking about the post that should be. I'm pregnant with things to say, but I don't know what they are. I guess I'd like to write the operative logics of Heaven. This is my closest attempt so far.

Ma Liberte

This is possibly my number one favourite song. I've known it since childhood, as it is often taught in French schools. One of my long term penpal and holiday friend taught it to me one summer, when we were about 10. The lyrics are absolutely haunting. But in truth, I'm just glad that someone wrote a song about the end of freedom.

And I'm happy that French schoolkids learn the depth of these spooky melancholy love songs when they're young. For some reason, we think it's fine. Later on, we're glad the songs have become part of our psyche, and we all grow up to become amazing French lovers, I guess.

Ma liberté
Longtemps je t'ai gardée
Comme une perle rare
Ma liberté
C'est toi qui m'as aidé
A larguer les amarres

My freedom
For so long i have kept you
Like a rare pearl
My freedom,
It's you who helped me
To set sails

Pour aller n'importe où
Pour aller jusqu'au bout
Des chemins de fortune
Pour cueillir en rêvant
Une rose des vents
Sur un rayon de lune

To go pretty much anywhere
To go to the end, at last
of all the hazardous roads
To pluck, while dreaming
The odd desert wind rose
On a ray of the moon

Ma liberté
Devant tes volontés
Mon âme était soumise
Ma liberté
Je t'avais tout donné
Ma dernière chemise

My freedom,
To your every whim
My soul was enslaved
My freedom,
I had given you everything
My last shirt.

Et combien j'ai souffert
Pour pouvoir satisfaire
Tes moindres exigences?
J'ai changé de pays
J'ai perdu mes amis
Pour gagner ta confiance

How much did I suffer
To try to satisfy
All your exigencies?
I changed countries
I lost my friends
To earn your trust

Ma liberté
Tu as su désarmer
Mes moindres habitudes
Ma liberté
Toi qui m'as fait aimer
Même la solitude

My freedom,
You have destroyed
All of my habits
My freedom
You taught me how to love
Even solitude

Toi qui m'as fait sourire
Quand je voyais finir
Une belle aventure
Toi qui m'as protégé
Quand j'allais me cacher
Pour soigner mes blessures

You made me smile
When beautiful times
Were coming to an end
You protected me
When I sought to hide
To heal my wounds

Ma liberté
Pourtant je t'ai quittée
Une nuit de décembre
J'ai déserté
Les chemins écartés
Que nous suivions ensemble

My freedom
Despite all, I left you
One December night
Forever I gave up
The odd and exciting roads
Which we treaded together

Lorsque sans me méfier
Les pieds et poings liés
Je me suis laissé faire
Et je t'ai trahie pour
Une prison d'amour
Et sa belle geôlière

I wasn't paying attention
When, my hands and feet tied
I didn't resist.
I betrayed you
For a prison of love
and its beautiful jailer.

An open letter to the GAFCON enthusiasts

Reading through some comments on the Jerusalem declaration, I’m bound to notice that I don’t even like a lot of churchy people. What is the point of travelling to the GAFCON conference on your own expense as a lay person, and then step up on some hyped-up podium to affirm that you are thrilled to have contributed to saving Anglicanism from dangerous unorthodoxy. Then what is the point of affirming, from your position of affluent privilege, that Jesus died the death we deserved? So my little sister deserves to be tortured to death? Says who? Wait a minute, I remember you. You’re the one that affirms that Gandhi is in hell. I’m very glad that I’ve very rarely been exposed to the fucked up theology that dwells in your head. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m not feeling very well.

Book review: Romero, A Life by James R. Brockman

Okay, I'll admit it, I'm only halfway through this book, which I picked up in an Oxfam bin some weeks ago, but I feel compelled to review it already. Romero, A Life is a re-edition of a 1982 books entitled The Word Remains, A Life of Oscar Romero.

I had picked it up in order to round up my knowledge of Liberation Theology and I got a lot more than I bargained for. The book is extraordinarily contextual and practical. It reminds me of Cavanaugh's Torture and Eucharist, but this time the issue is linked to Land Reforms in El Salvador. In short, the campesinos had no land and no resources, while a few families of large landowners were growing sugar cane for profit in giant fields, on the best land.

The book, because it is written by a serious researcher, exposes numerous chunks of material: the homilies of the priests of that time, the letters sent to Romero by the campesinos, excerpts from the reactionary press and its attempts to drag the Church back to the pre-Vatican II and Pre-Medellin apolitical position they knew.

I absolutely love this material, it makes Liberation Theology come alive in a way in which no other book had done for me before. It does not contain theories, and zero exortations for the reader: all the examples refer to things that were done practically, and words that were practically spoken from the pulpit by the protagonists of the time.

This book is an extraordinary resource. For the first time, I felt that Liberation Theology was not some vague flavour which we sometimes notice in the writings of some contemporary authors, it was not a beautifully written book which tries to convince a scholarly audience of the value of the Church of the Poor. Liberation Theology was done on a daily basis.

In the El Salvador of the late 1970's, it was everywhere. Going to church in that period was a totally different experience than the stuff we are exposed to these days. And Brockman, writing in 1982, does a grand job of transporting the reader into that period: if you had been there, that's what you would have heard preached; if you had been there, that's what you would have read in the paper; if you had been there, that's what you would believe about God, and about Salvation.

There are too many chunks of great material in this book for me to cite them all, but I'm happy to re-type one of them, in this instance, an exerpt from a series which the Jesuits of the time published in a national newpaper (before the national newspapers stopped accepting articles from them):

The church is trying to be faithful to the example of Christ, making itself one of the dispossesed and sharing their lives. The church is becoming displeasing and distressing for those who have privileges and economic power. The church preaches the good news and proclaims the truth, and that truth is disturbing. The Church interprets in the light of the good news the concrete situation that it lives in, and its word causes indignation. The church -that is, Christians- tries to live in agreement with the good news, and its behaviour surprises and angers. The church speaks of justice, and they say it preaches hatred. The church concerns itself for the dignity of the poor, and they say it promotes fratricidal struggles. The church tries to better human society, and it is accused with fury of meddling in what does not concern it. The church, like Jesus, tries to give preference to the poor and deprived, the great majority of Salavadorans; but curiously when it does so they say it is harming the country.

When that kind of material starts appearing in you local broadsheet, please remember to give me a shout.

Incidentally, this book also reconciled me with the profession of academic researcher. I'd always thought that the only sources worth reading were the protagonists: the liberation theologians themselves, the liberationist bishops themselves. Everything else was secondary literature. But let it be said that some secondary literature is awesome, and so well researched that I doubt even our prestigious protagonists could have done much better. Brockman has written an important page of the history of the Universal Church, I hope it doesn't disappear into oblivion. Apparently, Romero, A life is re-edited on a very regular basis, so there is hope.

Dany's first dabs at soteriology

It seems that all of my views of the issue are non-standard. I used to really hate this topic and refuse to even talk about it. There isn't a visual cross in all of this blog and there won't be, how about wearing a replica electric chair around your neck as well? But anyway, the proponents of some of the most questionnable theories of the atonement have no such qualms, and they teach their own view as the only view there is. So as someone with a grand total of zero hours of theology under my belt, here are my own two pence:

1. For a start we don’t really know. We cannot know. Claiming to understand God is ridiculous, it would be like my cat claiming to understand me. We can assume that Jesus knew what he was doing, and that his death does what he says it does.

2. The martyr option. Jesus refused to play by the rules of the empire of his day. He was really undermining them, and suffered the fate of those who did likewise.

3. The inhabiting human suffering option. God does not wish to remain privileged while we suffer.

4. Showing whose side God is on. God is with the ones you despise and torture.

5. Becoming vulnerable. You’re pissed off at God and you want to hurt Him? Go ahead. God is vulnerable, hurting him has been done before and it can be done now.

6. Freedom from fear (the Gandhi option). If your enemies want to exert force, let them. It is your fear that keeps them in power. When fear is gone, and you are able to absorb the blows and return only love, you undermine the foundations of violence.

Conspicuous by their absence from my little list are all the variants of Penal Substitution, Ransom and Christus Victor, which are accepted by quite a few churches while little heretic me refuses to even link to them.

Good questions!

Okay, I hope this is still fair use and not simple content lifting, but below are some of the very good questions asked by random internet surfers on the site of the Alpha Course (UK), which set up a survey asking: "If God did exist, what would you ask?".

I think that the site is quite well-made, as every question is boxed in separately, so it creates an impression of the solitude of each asker, while at the same time, listing them together in one place emphasises the common humanity of all who asked. Quite a few of the questions made me well up. Or maybe it’s the combination of them all, the mix of awe, sadness, anger, vulnerability and just sheer curiosity that is reflected in them.

Have you ever had a girlfriend?

If heaven is so wonderful why does nobody want to die?

Why are some people born into Christian families and some people not?

Can he sort out the current Credit Crisis ?

Why did you put me here? I want to die.

What is the point of wasps?

Is there evidence to support that Jesus body wasn’t stolen but he actually rose from the grave physically?

Why do i feel you even when i struggle to believe?

Will i get a girlfriend?

How many starving third world children could have been helped by the money used to fund the advertising campaign for this site?

What do you want me to do?

Why did one of your angels appear to Myself and my wife on 18TH OCTOBER 2004?

Can i have courage to change?

Why did my baby die?

You do not help people you just watch them die so what is your point in life?

What am i supposed to do with my life?

Is hell eternal torment?

Does the holy spirit make people tremble?

Does life exist on other planets?

What can i do improve myself in other to serve u(God) better?

Do I make you proud?

Why cant i hear you?

Why do all these other people hear and feel god but i dont?

Can you commit suicide?

Why make them rely on blind faith?

Could you explain yourself? About, like everything about the bible, you ,jesus, the earth the universe, heaven everything?

Why did you let me waste my life?

What happens when we die?

I will just say thanks for everything he given me.

For an ice-cream.

Can I and people I know can go to heaven?

What does god say about divorce?

Why did you cause pain and suffering to people in the old testament?

Why did you create parasites that bore into children's eyeballs?

How many people fancy me, or have ever fancied me?

Where is my mum?

Why, when my heart stopped for four minutes while in Afghanistan, did I see nothing?

Why am i not pretty?

Why do [we] have to do what you want?

Is Judas in heaven?

How can I hear you more clearly?

Would you keep me safe on a plane even if i didn’t pray and ask you to?

Where are my car keys?

Can you help me to give up cocaine and find pleasure from other means?

What is love?

Why don't you speak to me? Because I don't hear you when I pray or anything.

Do you approve of evangelism? Surely we should find you in our own ways?

Why did you create it all, not why is it as it is, but why did you do it?

Why have you not just simply come down and said look i'm here so behave?

How do I make the money I want to make?

Why didn't you step in and stop Auschwitz happening?

Do pets go to heaven?

If you love everyone equally, why do you feel the need to send some of us to hell for ever?

When I am on the floor in pain, where are you then?

Do protestants take holy communion?

Why did he allow the tsunami?

What does god think of muslims?

Do you know the future?

For forgiveness and understanding.

Is there a devil?

Should i stay with Seb?

Why have we not found a way to stop using petrol full stop, so that we don't destroy the planet.

What should i do with my wife?

Why did you say in the old testament that gay people should be killed?

Why do you entrust your message to people who are bound to misinterpret it?

Is praying for my non Christian friends and family enough to save them?

Is our destiny preordained?

Is heaven in the sky or is it just a feeling of peace?

Of all the diseases, which is your favourite?

Why should I worship you?

Is my dad ok?

Why am I so weak?

Oh God please can you help my Family reunion case in uk?

Would you like some toast?

Why is there so little charisma to attract people to Christian belief?

Will I go to heaven?

Why do Christians still lie?

Why not come back?

Why has the church become so removed from your original plan?

How can I make up for my past mistakes?

Why Don't You Help Those Children In Africa?

Why were you wrathful and jealous in the Old Testament but then kind and loving in the New Testament?

The effects of global warming are killing the planet, what’s going to happen?

If you let my mum die when I prayed that you would not why would I care if you're with me or not?

If you were real..... would you go for a drink with me ;)

Do i need to go to church to be a Christian?

Why do you need to test our faith?

Is there a plan or me, or do i make it myself?

What can we do to make the world and equal and just place?

Can any of us truly love?

Why should I believe in the existence of Christians?

You are asking all these questions but can we now see the answers too plz!

Am I good enough?

To talk to me :D

Why if miracles have happened why isn't there is no proof of any amputee being cured?

Is the scripture accurate?

What are you more annoyed with: people ignoring your teaching or deliberately misinterpreting it for their own ends

Why may a blind or lame person (Lev 21) not act as a priest? And if they may, why did you not retract the order?

Was jesus REALLY a white person

Why do I procrastinate?

Are there others, alians i mean?

Where is my mum?

Is abortion wrong?

What have you got against gay love?

If Jesus is non judgmental then why will he judge us at the end of time?

Do you believe in brainwashing others into having the same beliefs as each other ?

How would you describe yourself?

Can you help me have a more fulfilled life?

Why can i not stop thinking of you?

What does life after death look like?

Why do some children die in agony often over long periods of time?

Does he really answer your question when u really need him?

Why let men, in your name, kill, mame and slaughter during the inquisition?

Healing for my wife.

When will i get a job?

Why can't my financial blessings be released?

With jesus dieing on the cross how does that take our sins away???

Will i see my father?

I have sinned in the past will my children see my sins on the day of judgement?

Why can't I heal people?

Why do Christians have a relationship with Jesus, why do we need Jesus if we can talk to the head honcho (God)?

How can I communicate with god so that I know he hears me and Im sure of the authenticity of the reply?

If you love me, why do you threaten me with eternal damnation?

When we pray for healing why are some people blessed almost instantaneously and others not at all?

If God did exist, what would HE ask US?

How relevant is paying tithes into the coffers of the church?

Can I have more money please?

How can I help?

Can i have a faith even though i am gay?

If you are a loving God, how could you stand back and allow the Holocaust to happen, or little Madeleine McCann undiscovered?

How could a man be happy in Heaven if their wife was suffering eternally in Hell?

Why does God insist that people waste time worshipping, when they could be doing more important things?

How can our consciousness survive the death and disintegration of our brains?

How to make a cup of tea on the Sabbath?

This blog is gaining a bit of a nondescript monotheist flavour these days, borrowing liberally from Judaism and Islam, which I love doing, because it's easy to recognise familiar principles, but the expressions always seem so "new" when worded by the followers of another faith. They are a welcome escape from some of the widespread inanities associated with Pop Christianity these days. But anyway, I came across the Lubavitch method for making a cup of tea on the Sabbath. Seriously, go check it out!

(And while I'm at it, Yom Kippur begins on the eve of Thursday the 9th, and that's today, so I really did not pick the best day to have fun with sabbath laws. Maybe I'll do a more serious post sometime along the line. Like my freaking university holding a yearly mandatory training course for all postgraduate instructors... on Yom Kippur)

Pressed to move on...

When a child of a worshiper of Allah dies, Allah inquires from His angels:

'Have you taken into your custody the soul of the child of My servant?'

They answer, 'Yes.'

Then He inquires, 'Have you taken into custody the flower of his heart?'

They answer, 'Yes.'

Then He inquires, 'Then what did My servant say?'

They answer, 'He praised You and bore witness that to Allah we belong and to Him we shall return.'

Upon this Allah will say, 'Build for My servant a magnificent mansion in Paradise and name it: the House of Praise.'"

I just came across the most moving blog I have read in yonks. Sandra lost her toddler to a (preventable) car accident one and a half years ago. While her entourage was extremely supportive at the beginning, it seems like now they are pressing her to move on. She is too phony for them, too raw, too cuckoo. Her marriage fell apart a couple of weeks ago, and now the people who supported her most are starting to engage in some serious backbiting. Sandra feels totally misunderstood and betrayed.

I’m not surprised that most religions consider the loss of a child as the single worst thing that can happen to a human being. And I’m not surprised by the negativity and backbiting that surfaces when people have to deal with this level of tragedy, over a period of time, when they don’t have the skills to process such emotions (and does one ever acquire these?).

I’ve left a comment in support, I hope it’s a good one, but it just breaks my heart to see love flounder in such predictable ways when people need it most, and for the stupidest reasons. Just because it hurts both parents too bad, and they deal with it in different ways. Because they both think the other should be doing things differently. Once again, duration is everything. It's easy to be supportive for a month or two. But after that, "she'd better fucking move on".

The painting is by William Bouguereau. The vierge consolatrice is displayed in my home town of Strasbourg. In real life it is a very tall painting, displayed in a crimson room on its own, and very softly lit. It's absolutely haunting, because it is incredibly sad and incredibly comforting and hopeful at the same time. It feels like the Virgin Mary understands and that nobody will judge you, ever. In truth I'm pretty pleased that this painting should be "ours". Sorry I couldn't find a picture with a better definition on the web. The above quote is by Abd al-Alim al-Ashari.

The church building's leaking roof and other considerations

He says that it's a ton of work raising enough money to fix the church building's leaking roof, that the congregation has been working tirelessly to get this sorted, and that the old ladies who did the fundraising are the real footsoldiers of the Church.

He says that running a parish is extemely intensive work, and when you throw in the extra hours you put at the diocese, you're looking at a sixty hour week, while also technically being on call 24/7 to speak to the families of 21-year-olds who die in car crashes, and that kind of jig.

He says that if you ever get some free time during the week, you check up on the people that got married, or brought their infant up for baptism, or had a funeral at your church. And that most of the time they don't want to hear from you, no matter how much they played along before the wedding, baptism or funeral.

He says that reaching out to the poor and the homeless is not his core business and that it cannot be because he's busy and would not be able to do it well. He says if you've got a project then first get the qualifications (or enlist people who have got them), then design your project professionally, then find the funds, then get it endorsed by the diocesan Anglicare, and then bring it up for discussion.

He says he'd be excited to help you make it happen, if you do most of the work. He says he'll back you up but you need to get to it.

I hate it but I don't know why.