"The only sign that he had held the hand of tragedy was the slightly subdued level of his affability, and also the swift, deep look of bafflement that might suddenly pass over his face. " ~ Elizabeth Strout
Monday, H. and I just got hammered. Never knew I could put so much beer into me in just one sitting. I came home, nursed a further very full glass of Scotch and then cried all night long.
Tuesday at work, I thought I would never be able to smile again. I was completely unable to relate with my work contacts in the friendly way I had before. Making a simple work-related phonecall while sounding reasonably friendly seemed impossible. I asked one of my friends from the counselling class if I might debrief with her for a quarter of an hour. She was great. I then forced myself to go to a voice class though I did not feel like it and hated every minute. Didn't sleep at all that night.
Wednesday, I got plenty of praise at work for a organisational relationship I'd spend six months repairing by being the middle man in all their communications and making sure this worked out. I also had plenty of time on the train to finish the novel I'd started reading a few days before on that platform. That night I slept like a baby.
Thursday, meeting in London. They all love me down there and can't quite believe what an efficient, clever girl they managed to recruit. I juggled stats for the whole day which impresses the hell out of people who don't do stats. It feels good. After the meeting I walked from Hyde Park to Clerkenwell Close just to take in a bit of London. At Clerkenwell Close I met the lovely girl from CRED Jewellery, who have been trailblazing fairtrade gold since 1996. I bought H. and I some seriously kosher wedding bands right here and right there. On the train back to Durham I read Joseph Stiglitz. Food for thought.
Friday in Durham, H. had an interview with the still-bishop of Durham for his research. I helped him prepare. I wish I could have gone in but meanwhile there was plenty of bookshops for me to browse in Bishop Auckland. H. had a rocking time and came out of his scholarly interview with a huge smile. I'm mildly jealous, but I'll listen to the MP3 anyway so it's almost as if I'd been there. We had a pub lunch. Then I called my best friend in hospital. Looking out the same window at H.'s place, I kept her entertained during the early phase of her first son's birth. Soon, we'll get hammered in his honour too. Any excuse.
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