Monday 18 June 2007

One very lame post

I can’t believe this. I spent half an hour trying to pray and I could not even say an Our Father loud and clear, with moving lips, one that could be heard at the other end of this room where there is only me and God.

I also spent part of the day blogging “out of my pocket” as Quakers would say, so I ended up removing the three posts that have appeared here today. I’m sorry. Dan’s post upset me so much that I had tried to come up with a quick way to deal with it.

Right now, I’m thinking about logging onto Wikipedia to see if I don’t fancy following Shiva instead of Christ after all. I’ve no idea what it means to take up one’s cross daily. The internet is unhelpful and God seems to want me to say a loud "Our Father" right here and right now, which I can’t. Just how lame can lame get?

Other factoids from the day:

- The plane my best friend was on caught fire while in the air. They landed safely. My best friend is alive.
- Alex knocked on my door while I was trying to pray, she had a broad smile on her face.
- A couple of secular friends, whom I thought I had freaked out forever by showing them this blog are actually not freaked out after all.
- I feel seriously humbled and I hate it.
- I'm going to have a cup of tea

(and the freaking bonus: my indonesian flatmate was absentmindedly humming Cohen's Hallelujah in front of the telly while I was boiling water for tea. Spooky shit. Go away, I'm a sinful woman.)

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I truly think that cigaretts can sometimes solve all of our problems. Cigarettes AND a glass of wine.

Plus, my friend Corrie and I were talking yesterday and she heard this woman talk about prayer. How prayer can be so much more than just talking to God. How our actions can be prayer too. This is good and resonates with me, because sometimes I don't actually have words.

-robin

Dany said...

Nothing beats cigarettes under the sky! I agree about praying with what we do.

Although I also found out that if you can't pray, you can always ask God for "the spirit of prayer". Hungering for that can't be bad.

It's my conviction that I'm going to end up having to ask for every single grace of God. And the ability to pray is a huge grace.

Sorry it took me a week the reply to your comment. I'm so rude. I wanted to come up with something deep and significant, as deep as your comment anyway.